Your brain has two modes of thinking:• System 1: Fast, automatic, intuitive• System 2: Slow, deliberate, analyticalMost of our decisions start in System 1—even when we think we’re being rational.

Two Systems, One Mind

System 1 is efficient but prone to biases. It relies on mental shortcuts (heuristics) that can lead to errors in judgment, like jumping to conclusions or misjudging risk.

System 1 Isn’t Always Right

We’re wired to create stories to explain events—even if those stories are wrong. We often mistake coherence for truth, which leads to overconfidence in our knowledge.

The Illusion of Understanding

We feel the pain of loss twice as strongly as we feel the joy of gain. This influences everything from investing to decision-making in relationships.

Loss Aversion is Real

True insight and better decision-making come when we engage System 2—when we slow down, ask questions, and challenge our initial reactions.

Slowing Down is Power

Nothing in life is as important as you think it is, while you are thinking about it.

Thinking, Fast and Slow by Daniel Kahneman explores how we think using two systems: one fast and intuitive, the other slow and logical. It reveals how biases shape our decisions—and how understanding them helps us think smarter.

Major New York Times bestseller Winner of the National Academy of Sciences Best Book Award in 2012 Selected by the New York Times Book Review as one of the ten best books of 2011 A Globe and Mail Best Books of the Year 2011 Title One of The Economist's 2011 Books of the Year One of The Wall Street Journal's Best Nonfiction Books of the Year 2011 2013 Presidential Medal of Freedom Recipient Kahneman's work with Amos Tversky is the subject of Michael Lewis's The Undoing Project: A Friendship That Changed Our Minds In his mega bestseller, Thinking, Fast and Slow, Daniel Kahneman, the renowned psychologist and winner of the Nobel Prize in Economics, takes us on a groundbreaking tour of the mind and explains the two systems that drive the way we think. System 1 is fast, intuitive, and emotional; System 2 is slower, more deliberative, and more logical. The impact of overconfidence on corporate strategies, the difficulties of predicting what will make us happy in the future, the profound effect of cognitive biases on everything from playing the stock market to planning our next vacation—each of these can be understood only by knowing how the two systems shape our judgments and decisions. Engaging the reader in a lively conversation about how we think, Kahneman reveals where we can and cannot trust our intuitions and how we can tap into the benefits of slow thinking. He offers practical and enlightening insights into how choices are made in both our business and our personal lives—and how we can use different techniques to guard against the mental glitches that often get us into trouble. Winner of the National Academy of Sciences Best Book Award and the Los Angeles Times Book Prize and selected by The New York Times Book Review as one of the ten best books of 2011, Thinking, Fast and Slow is destined to be a classic.

Understand yourself and those around you.

psychology

Psychology

personaldevelopment

Personal Development

mindfulness

Mindfulness

mentalhealth

Mental Health

books

Books

Daniel Kahneman (born 5 March 1934) is an Israeli-American psychologist and winner of the 2002 Nobel Memorial Prize in Economic Sciences, notable for his work on behavioral finance and hedonic psychology.With Amos Tversky and others, Kahneman established a cognitive basis for common human errors using heuristics and biases (Kahneman & Tversky, 1973, Kahneman, Slovic & Tversky, 1982), and developed Prospect theory (Kahneman & Tversky, 1979). He was awarded the 2002 Nobel Prize in Economics for his work in Prospect theory. Currently, he is professor emeritus of psychology at Princeton University's Department of Psychology.

Daniel Kahneman

Thinking, Fast and Slow

Living single in your early 30s can feel either terrifying or exhilarating—like you’re untouchable one moment and questioning everything the next.  FREEDOM impacts each of us differently. Some people thrive in solitude, while others feel most free within a secure relationship. As I write this, I’m reminded that freedom is one of my core values—one I fiercely protect.  If freedom matters to you, you’ve probably felt that internal alarm when it’s threatened. This makes dating in our 30s feel tougher than in our 20s—we know ourselves better, and we’re more aware of what’s at stake: our values.

30 Years Old And Free

People who prioritize their freedom aren’t immediately available. Yet somehow, that makes them immediately more attractive.  I’ve been on both sides—drawn to unavailable men and being the unavailable one for men who wanted me. Both experiences taught me the same lesson, which became a firm belief: It’s not unavailability itself that’s attractive, but someone’s ability to stand by their values.So I wonder: Are we really drawn to them, or to the self-respect and loyalty one embodies —qualities we wish we had more of ourselves?

Here’s the catch:

<ul><li>Does this explain why we sometimes chase self-centered people, even when they’re not particularly smart or physically attractive?  </li></ul>And more importantly, does it also explain why, when someone seems too eager to have us, we don’t feel special—but uneasy? As if it’s not really about us, but about what we represent: strong boundaries and unshaken values.  <ul><li>Is availability unattractive? And since healthy relationships require both people to be present, how do we balance the two?  </li></ul>

Here’s Some Reflection:

How can availability become attractive?

What makes dating so difficult in our 30s?

education

Learning & Education

communication

Communication

loveandrelationships

Love & Relationships

Available or Attractive? 

By The more you analyze, the worse you feel. Overthinking leads to anxiety, indecision, and emotional exhaustion.

Overthinking is a Mental Trap

Identify Thought PatternsRecognize when you’re spiraling into negative thinking. Awareness is the first step to breaking the cycle.

Overthinking thrives on inaction. Take small steps instead of waiting for the “perfect” decision.

Action Beats Anxiety

Perfectionism fuels overthinking. Accept that mistakes are part of progress and growth.

Stop Seeking Perfection

Challenge self-doubt by asking: Is this fact or fear? Change your inner dialogue to a more positive perspective.

Reframe Negative Thoughts

Overthinking is often about the past (regret) or the future (worry). Practice mindfulness to stay in the now.

Focus on the Present

Give yourself a “worry window”—a set time to think about concerns, then move on. This prevents constant mental clutter.

Set Boundaries with Your Thoughts

Worrying about the uncontrollable drains energy. Redirect your focus to what you can change.

Let Go of What You Can’t Control

“The mind is a powerful tool—use it wisely, or it will use you.”

Overthinking fuels anxiety, stress, and indecision. In Stop Overthinking, Nick Trenton shares practical strategies to break negative thought loops, calm your mind, and regain control. Learn to challenge intrusive thoughts, embrace the present, and stop letting your mind work against you.

Overcome negative thought patterns, reduce stress, and live a worry-free life.Overthinking is the biggest cause of unhappiness. Don't get stuck in a never-ending thought loop. Stay present and keep your mind off things that don't matter, and never will.Break free of your self-imposed mental prison.Stop Overthinking is a book that understands where you've been through,the exhausting situation you've put yourself into, and how you lose your mind in the trap of anxiety and stress. Acclaimed author Nick Trenton will walk you through the obstacles with detailed and proven techniques to help you rewire your brain, control your thoughts, and change your mental habits.What's more, the book will provide you scientific approaches to completely change the way you think and feel about yourself by ending the vicious thought patterns.Stop agonizing over the past and trying to predict the future.Nick Trenton grew up in rural Illinois and is quite literally a farm boy. His best friend growing up was his trusty companion Leonard the dachshund. RIP Leonard. Eventually, he made it off the farm and obtained a BS in Economics, followed by an MA in Behavioral Psychology.Powerful ways to stop ruminating and dwelling on negative thoughts.-How to be aware of your negative spiral triggers-Identify and recognize your inner anxieties-How to keep the focus on relaxation and action-Proven methods to overcome stress attacks-Learn to declutter your mind and find focusUnleash your unlimited potential and start living.No more self-deprecating talk. No more sleepless nights with racing thoughts. Free your mind from overthinking and achieve more, feel better, and unleash your potential. Finally be able to live in the present moment.

motivationandinspiration

Motivation & Inspiration

Nick Trenton

Stop Overthinking

Success is the sum of small efforts, repeated day in and day out.

<ul><li class="ql-align-justify">Writing should become a part of your daily routine.</li><li class="ql-align-justify">Create a consistent environment where you write every day.</li><li class="ql-align-justify">Discipline over inspiration is the key to success in writing.</li></ul>

1. The Importance of Routine

<ul><li class="ql-align-justify">King compares a writer's toolbox to a carpenter’s: the more tools you have, the better.</li><li class="ql-align-justify">Start with the basics like vocabulary and grammar before mastering more advanced techniques.</li><li class="ql-align-justify">Each writer’s toolbox is unique, but they should always keep it well-stocked.</li></ul>

2. The Writer’s Toolbox

<ul><li class="ql-align-justify">The act of writing is about transferring your thoughts directly to the reader’s mind.</li><li class="ql-align-justify">Your words should connect emotionally with readers, as if speaking directly to them.</li><li class="ql-align-justify">It’s all about creating an emotional bond between you and your audience.</li></ul>

3. Writing Is a Form of Telepathy

<ul><li class="ql-align-justify">Don’t expect your first draft to be perfect—it’s just you telling yourself the story.</li><li class="ql-align-justify">King advises focusing on getting the words down, then revising and refining them.</li><li class="ql-align-justify">Trust the process of rewriting and making changes until you get it right.</li></ul>

4. First Drafts Are Not Perfect

You don’t have to be great to start, but you have to start to be great.

<ul><li class="ql-align-justify">Starting can be the hardest part of writing, but it’s essential.</li><li class="ql-align-justify">Don’t wait for the perfect moment; just begin, even if it’s only for 30 minutes a day.</li><li class="ql-align-justify">But here’s the kicker: While Stephen King offers all this advice, you need the right tools to get started and stay on track.</li><li class="ql-align-justify">Avoid wasting time and energy feeling lost. My Beginner Writers' Cheat Sheet gives you a clear roadmap for planning, writing, and staying motivated from day one. Don’t miss out! Get it now, and stop letting hesitation hold you back! </li><li class="ql-align-justify"><a href="https://anupchouhan.gumroad.com/l/EssentialTipsforBeginnerWriters">Download Now for FREE</a></li></ul>

5. Starting the Writing Journey—Don’t Overwhelm Yourself!

King stresses the importance of reading for writers.Read a variety of genres to expand your vocabulary and understanding of different writing styles.The more you read, the better your writing will become.

6. The Power of Reading

King explains that storytelling is at the heart of all writing.Good stories are built on relatable characters, a compelling plot, and a clear direction.Your writing should engage readers, leaving them eager to know what happens next.

7. The Art of Storytelling

Rejection is inevitable, but it’s a part of the process.Use rejection as a motivator to improve and keep going.King shares his own experience with rejection letters and how they shaped his writing journey.

8. Dealing with Rejection

<ul><li class="ql-align-justify">Writers must be willing to cut out unnecessary parts of their work.</li><li class="ql-align-justify">King advocates for letting the story “breathe” and cutting anything that doesn’t serve the narrative.</li><li class="ql-align-justify">Editing is where the magic happens, shaping the raw material into a polished story.</li></ul>

9. The Value of Self-Editing

It does not matter how slowly you go as long as you do not stop.

<ul><li class="ql-align-justify">Success in writing doesn’t come overnight.</li><li class="ql-align-justify">King emphasizes the importance of persistence, even when facing challenges.</li><li class="ql-align-justify">Keep writing, keep improving, and never give up—success will follow.</li></ul>

10. Persistence is Key

<ul><li class="ql-align-justify">Stay connected with me on all platforms through my <a href="https://linktr.ee/anupchouhan">Linktree</a>.</li><li class="ql-align-justify">Want access to high-value digital products, both free and premium?</li><li class="ql-align-justify">Subscribe to my <a href="https://anupchouhan.gumroad.com/">Gumroad store</a> and be the first to grab exclusive releases straight to your inbox. Don’t miss out! Get the best offers before anyone else!</li></ul>

Thanks For Reading!

Ready to Write Like Stephen King? Start Here!

productivity

Productivity

habits

Habits

Stephen King

On Writing

People don’t know what they want until you show it to them.

<ul><li class="ql-align-justify">People often struggle to explain what truly motivates them.</li><li class="ql-align-justify">They might say one thing but feel another.</li><li class="ql-align-justify">Leaders must observe behavior, not just listen to words.</li></ul>

1. Employees Don’t Always Know What They Need

<ul><li class="ql-align-justify">Employees make decisions based on habits, not deep thinking.</li><li class="ql-align-justify">Their brains look for the easiest path, even in work situations.</li><li class="ql-align-justify">Understanding these shortcuts can help managers create better workflows.</li></ul>

2. The Brain Takes Shortcuts

<ul><li class="ql-align-justify">Tiny adjustments in the workplace can improve employee engagement.</li><li class="ql-align-justify">Changing how questions are asked can lead to better responses.</li><li class="ql-align-justify">Making processes easier encourages employees to perform better.</li></ul>

3. Small Changes Have Big Effects

<ul><li class="ql-align-justify">Employees care more about being treated fairly than getting a raise.</li><li class="ql-align-justify">Unequal treatment can create resentment.</li><li class="ql-align-justify">Leaders should focus on fairness in promotions, feedback, and opportunities.</li></ul>

4. People Value Fairness Over Rewards

<ul><li class="ql-align-justify">Not knowing what will happen next makes employees anxious.</li><li class="ql-align-justify">Clear communication reduces workplace stress.</li><li class="ql-align-justify">Even bad news is better than no news at all.</li></ul>

5. Uncertainty is Stressful

<ul><li class="ql-align-justify">Bonuses and rewards only work if they truly matter to employees.</li><li class="ql-align-justify">Generic incentives don’t motivate everyone equally.</li><li class="ql-align-justify">Leaders should personalize rewards based on what employees value.</li></ul>

6. Incentives Must Be Meaningful

<ul><li class="ql-align-justify">People need to know their opinions matter.</li><li class="ql-align-justify">A simple "thank you" or "good idea" can boost morale.</li><li class="ql-align-justify">Leaders should actively listen and encourage open discussions.</li></ul>

7. Employees Want to Feel Heard

<ul><li class="ql-align-justify">A positive workplace culture increases motivation.</li><li class="ql-align-justify">Toxic environments lead to burnout and disengagement.</li><li class="ql-align-justify">Leaders must set the tone by showing respect and appreciation.</li></ul>

8. Work Culture Shapes Productivity

<ul><li class="ql-align-justify">People resist change because it feels risky.</li><li class="ql-align-justify">Leaders should introduce changes gradually.</li><li class="ql-align-justify">Explaining the "why" behind changes helps employees accept them.</li></ul>

9. Change is Hard, Even for Employees Who Want It

<ul><li class="ql-align-justify">Employees work best when they trust their leaders.</li><li class="ql-align-justify">Broken trust leads to low motivation and high turnover.</li><li class="ql-align-justify">Leaders must be honest, reliable, and consistent to build trust.</li></ul>

10. Trust is the Key to a Thriving Workplace

The Workplace Secret Your Employees Won’t Tell You!

A Science-Based Organizational Change Roadmap for Managers “A science-based playbook that is a must-read for every manager of people…” —John A. List, Wall Street Journal bestselling author of The Voltage Effect and The Why Axis #1 New Release in Office Management and Business Operations Research Adapting to change is part of life. But, change is hard and managing change is even harder. First, understand how the brain works. Because we really don’t know how the brain works, we don’t know what makes us more receptive to change. Employees can’t tell their managers what they need to “get on the train”, and managers don’t know either. How to get your team on board. In her first book, What Your Customer Wants and Can't Tell You, author and behavioral economics specialist Melina Palmer, applies the science of behavioral economics to unlocking what is behind customer decisions. Behavioral economics combines elements of economics and psychology to understand how and why people behave the way they do in the real world. Now, in her sequel, What Your Employees Need and Can’t Tell You, she offers a highly actionable roadmap for business executives and managers faced with the task of instituting successful organizational change. Actionable behavioral economics for successful change management. What Your Employees Need and Can’t Tell You delivers insights and research from behavioral economics and the greater behavioral sciences, presented in an enjoyable way that you can actually use to get results. Inside find: • An introduction to how the brain really works when faced with change• Insights into key biases and concepts the subconscious brain uses to make decisions• “Apply it” sections with tips on how to start using what you have learned—immediately If you are responsible for managing change and have tried books such as The Heart of Business, Humanocracy, or Change, you should read Melina Palmer’s What Your Employees Need and Can’t Tell You.

Melina Palmer

What Your Employees Need and Can't Tell You

Traditional note-taking is broken and outdated. You highlight books, save articles, and jot down ideas. But when was the last time you used those notes? Probably never because it’s not efficient.

The Problem With Taking Notes

If you’re using a digital reader, you may have built small knowledge centers organized for each book. But you can’t decide how to organize those ideas. You are limited to the scope of the book. And that can become frustrating. Also, what about podcasts? You can’t take notes on Spotify or any other podcast app. At this rate, your mental notes will pile up, and you will forget most of them.

Tradition Note-Taking

I love the <a href="https://cosmopolitanmindset.substack.com/p/the-second-brain-method">idea of a second brain </a>. I wrote about it. I shared my Notion template a few months ago and have used it since then. But building a second brain is not for everyone. You don’t always need that level of complexity. Sometimes, all you need is something simpler to store notes and ideas. A dynamic space that lets your ideas breathe, grow, and connect naturally.Are you ready to grow your garden? Here's how to do it step-by-step. But first, what is a digital garden?

The Second Brain Technique

You're reading an excerpt from <a href="https://cosmopolitanmindset.substack.com/">The Challenge</a> — a weekly newsletter dedicated to self-improvement, goal-setting, habits, time management, and health tips.Every week, you'll receive:<ul><li class="ql-align-justify">A life-enhancing challenge</li><li class="ql-align-justify">A custom infographic to track your progress</li></ul><a href="https://cosmopolitanmindset.substack.com/subscribe">Join 3700+ driven individuals</a> and take your first challenge.

The Challenge

Traditional note-taking is linear and static. You have a notebook or any other space and write everything there. But a digital garden isn’t organic. It’s interconnected and ever-evolving. And that’s why it works.Think of planting seeds (raw ideas), nurturing them (on the workbench), and harvesting valuable knowledge. If done right, a digital garden offers:<ul><li class="ql-align-justify">Organized, easily accessible thoughts. </li><li class="ql-align-justify">A dynamic system that grows with you. </li><li class="ql-align-justify">Clearer, actionable insights that avoid overwhelm.</li></ul>Whatever your daily responsibilities, cultivating a digital garden can transform your productivity and creativity.

What Exactly Is a Digital Garden?

Creating a digital garden doesn’t need to be complicated. I will also give you a Notion template to start. But if you wish to update it or create your own, here’s what you may want to do.

How to Build a Digital Garden

Choose a tool that fits your style or that you already know. You don’t have to reinvent the wheel, especially if you’re beginning.Popular options include Notion, Obsidian, Roam Research, or your website. I recommend Notion because it’s user-friendly and highly customizable. Also, if you’re already using my second brain template, it’s easier to integrate it into your existing workflow.

1 — Choose Your Platform

Your digital garden should follow whatever structure you want. It’s yours — organize it as you wish. But a clear structure will help it thrive if this is your first time. Here’s a proven setup.

2 — Set Up the Core Sections

Use this section to capture fleeting thoughts, inspirations, or interesting conversations. It may be the book you read or the podcast you listened to this morning.Collect here everything that catches your attention. Anything that has the potential to be helpful in the future.Example: Notes from books, conversations, articles, podcast extracts.

🌱 Seed Notes — Raw Ideas

In this section, you will keep all the polished ideas you’ve developed further.Some ideas will never make it to this section. Yet, you will upgrade the best ones. You will actively take and build them further. They will become more complex systems. And you can always get back to check them whenever you need it.Example: Personal lessons, frameworks, summaries.

🍃 Evergreen Notes — Refined Insights

The resource library is a fundamental piece of a second brain, so we will also integrate it here. In this section, you will keep all your favorite articles, books, videos, and podcasts organized for easy reference.You can easily retrieve the source if you need to check an incomplete note. Or maybe you want to consult a resource to get more ideas. Put here everything you consume.

📚 Resource Library — Curated Inspirations

You must work on your ideas if you build a digital garden. And sometimes you need a few days, or even months, to fully elaborate a concept — that’s why you need a workbench.Project, drafts, research notes — collect everything you’re working on in this section.Example: Draft blog posts, research notes, ongoing projects.

🛠️ Workbench — Ideas in Progress

Finally, you will have a central entry point with quick access to recent notes, favorites, and easy note-taking tools.

🏡 Dashboard — Central Hub

As for a real garden, a digital one will thrive only if you give it attention daily.<ul><li class="ql-align-justify">Make it a habit. Add one new note per day to keep ideas flowing.</li><li class="ql-align-justify">Refine regularly. Review seed notes every month and turn them into evergreen content.</li><li class="ql-align-justify">Delete old ideas. Some concepts remain frozen for so much time you don’t even remember why you wrote them. Delete them before your seed notes section becomes too crowded.</li><li class="ql-align-justify">Connect ideas. Use internal links and tags to create meaningful connections.</li><li class="ql-align-justify">Experiment with formats. Don’t limit yourself to text. You can build mind maps, lists, tables, or visual notes. </li></ul>

3 - Keep Your Digital Garden Growing

To get you gardening quickly, I've created a <a href="https://cosmopolitanmindset.substack.com/p/the-ultimate-guide-to-building-a-digital-garden">comprehensive Notion template</a> you can use immediately (find the button below in the article).What’s Inside:<ul><li class="ql-align-justify">Pre-build sections: Seed Notes, Evergreen Notes, Resource Library, Workbench and Dashboard.</li><li class="ql-align-justify">Tagging & filtering system for organizing ideas.</li><li class="ql-align-justify">Example notes demonstrating how to use it.</li></ul>How to Use It:<ul><li class="ql-align-justify">Beginner user → Use it as it is for immediate productivity and creativity.</li><li class="ql-align-justify">Advanced user → Customize with your categories and workflows.</li></ul>

The Digital Garden Notion Starter Kit

I started building a digital garden a few weeks ago, but it has changed my creativity.It transformed scattered thoughts into clear connections. Over time, this habit became more than just productivity — it enhanced my creativity and clarity and reduced stress.Download the Notion template and create your first three seed notes — ideas you've recently found intriguing, insights from something you read, or conversations that sparked your interest.Share screenshots or descriptions of your digital garden with our community. Let's inspire each other and celebrate these initial steps!

The Challenge of The Week

<a href="https://cosmopolitanmindset.substack.com/">Unlock exclusive content</a> and take your self-improvement to the next level with a premium subscription.<ul><li class="ql-align-justify">✅ The Productivity Mastery Series – Proven productivity systems in Notion, ready for you to implement.</li><li class="ql-align-justify">📚 The Challenge Book Club – Actionable insights from the best personal growth books so you can apply their lessons without reading them all.</li><li class="ql-align-justify">🔥 Monthly Exclusive Content – The top 5 must-read articles, behind-the-scenes life updates, full archive, and more.</li></ul><a href="https://cosmopolitanmindset.substack.com/subscribe">Join 3700+ driven individuals</a> who are serious about growth. Upgrade now and invest in your future.

Next Steps

Stop losing ideas! Learn how to build a digital garden to organize, connect, and grow your knowledge — plus grab a free Notion template to get started!

creativity

Creativity

leadershipandmanagement

Leadership & Management

The Ultimate Guide to Building a Digital Garden (with a Free Notion Template!)

Table of ContentsThe Euphoric StageTake the Love QuizThe Early Attachment StageThe Crisis StageThe Deep Attachment Stage

From Euphoria to Deep Attachment

Falling in love is easy, but making a relationship work is challenging.Just like anything else worth having in life, relationships require effort. Some couples manage to overcome difficulties, while others simply grow apart.

Relationships Take Effort

When it comes to coupling, there is no instruction manual. Remember that old playground mantra: First comes love, then comes marriage, then comes so and so and a baby carriage?

There's No Checklist

Love is not a one-size-fits-all journey.While some marry and have kids, others take different paths. Each relationship is unique, just like each person.The stages of love remain the same, regardless of the path taken. The key to a happy relationship? Navigating these stages together.

The Many Paths of Love

Neuroscientists and 'experts in love' have outlined 4 stages of a relationship. These stages go from falling in love to living happily ever after (or at least, for a while). Here are the stages they have found, along with ways to successfully navigate each one:

Love Stages

You can break these stages down based on when they typically occur:Stage 1: The euphoric stage - 6 months to 24 months (2 years)Stage 2: The early attachment stage - 12 months (1 year) to 60 months (5 years)Stage 3: The crisis stage - 60 months (5 years) to 84 months (7 years)Stage 4: The deep attachment stage - 84 months (7 years) and beyond

The 4 Stages Of Love

The euphoric stage is sometimes known as the 'honeymoon phase.' What makes this stage so magical?For the past several decades, Helen Fisher, PhD, neuroscientist and Senior Research Fellow at the Kinsey Institute, and Lucy Brown, PhD, Clinical Professor in Neurology at Einstein College of Medicine in New York, have been studying the brain activity of people in love, from the early to the later stages.

Stage 1

In the early part of a relationship—the falling in love stage—the other person is the center of your life. You forgive everything in these early stages. The other person has faults, and you see them, but it doesn’t matter. Maybe they leave their dirty dishes in the sink, but they make you laugh at least daily, so it’s okay. Good things outweigh the negative here."

Suspending negative judgement is vital for a happy relationship. This means decreasing activity in the prefrontal cortex, which judges people negatively. Couples who can maintain this for longer have higher chances of success.In a follow-up study, researchers found that those who stayed together for 3 or more years showed significant decrease in activity in this brain region. This highlights the importance of suspending negative judgement for a lasting relationship.

Key to Relationship Success

Research shows that the passionate stage in relationships can last anywhere from 6 months to 2 years. However, a small percentage of couples (15% to 30%) claim to still feel the same excitement even after 10 or 15 years.This means that the "honeymoon phase" has an expiration date, but some couples can keep the spark alive for much longer. So, don't worry if the intense feelings eventually fade – it's completely normal.

How Long Will It Last?

Brown explains, "We don't know why this is. I don't necessarily think it's because they have found their soulmates. I think it's the person. Some people have an easier time rekindling the earlier stages. Not to say the rest of us can't."For the general population, the intoxication of new love will eventually morph into the next stage: early attachment.Remember, love is a journey, not a destination.

A Journey To Early Attachment - Stage 2

In the previous stage of falling in love, unconscious factors like attraction and the pleasure-reward system take over. Brain scans of couples in this stage showed high levels of dopamine, the chemical that triggers intense pleasure.Now, the more evolved parts of the brain, like the ventral pallidum and attachment hormones, take the lead. These hormones, such as oxytocin, are known as "the love hormone" and are responsible for attachment and bonding.

The Early Attachment Stage

You know when you’ve reached the early attachment stage when, “You can sleep! You’re not thinking about [your partner] 24 hours a day. It’s easier to do other things in your life.”

Couples that had been married for at least one year described love differently. “It’s richer, deeper, it’s knowing them better," says Brown. “Memories have been integrated—both positive and negative—you’ve gone through some difficulties, and you’ve developed a strong attachment.”

In relationships, the third stage is crucial - it's known as the "seven-year or five-year itch."<ul><li>According to Brown, every relationship has a drift apart phase.</li><li>This can either lead to coming back together or drifting apart.</li><li>A crisis can be the key to overcoming this phase and talking it out together.</li></ul>For some couples, having children can either solidify their bond or cause stress that breaks the relationship apart. If the crisis stage is successfully overcome, the next stage is deep attachment.

The 3rd Stage of Relationships: Make or Break Point

In a relationship, the deep attachment stage is the calm after the storm. It's when a couple knows each other well and has been through the challenges. They have confidence in their ability to handle crises and have a plan for future ones. This stage is marked by security and stability.After many years together, couples can experience a lasting, secure connection. If you're fortunate, this stage can last a lifetime.

The Deep Attachment Stage 4

How can we keep love going? According to researchers, one of the best ways is through novelty. Studies show that doing new, exciting, and challenging activities together can benefit relationships.Dr. Art Aron and his wife, Dr. Elaine Aron, developed the "Self Expansion Model" to explain the intense feelings in the early stages of love. It reveals why the first few months of a new relationship can feel so exhilarating.

Keeping It Going

When you enter into a relationship, you literally increase who you are. You take on and share in your partner’s perspective on the world in addition to your own, their social status, and their resources. The benefits of new and challenging experiences together are enormous. And they last.

From the honeymoon phase to long-lasting commitment, nearly every couple goes through these stages of love. If you can successfully make it through turbulent times together, your bond will be strengthened and your commitment will be secure and steadfast.

Final Thoughts

Finding lasting love requires suspension of judgment, rekindling the early stages, and maintaining novelty.Don't judge your partner too quickly, keep the passion and excitement alive, and always look for new ways to show your love. These could be the keys to unlocking long-term happiness in your relationship.

Cracking the Code of Lasting Love

Top neuroscientists in the field of love explain what happens to our brains as we move through the stages of romantic relationships.

Navigating the 4 Stages of a Relationship

"Creativity is intelligence having fun."

<ul><li class="ql-align-justify">Creativity is about finding new ideas and solutions.</li><li class="ql-align-justify">It’s not just for artists; everyone can be creative.</li><li class="ql-align-justify">It’s a skill that can be developed with practice.</li></ul>

1. Understanding Creativity

Master Creativity and Change Your Life Forever!

New ideas help businesses gain an advantage over their rivals. Employees who generate these new ideas -- who practice the art of creative thinking -- are one of a company's greatest assets. The Art of Creative Thinking shows the reader practical ways of becoming a more creative thinker. Each succinct chapter is built around one core idea which is then developed and illustrated. End-of-chapter key points summarize the main points. The Art of Creative Thinking shows you how to: develop your understanding of the creative process; overcome barriers to creating new ideas; broaden your vision; build on new ideas; develop a creative attitude; become more confident as a creative thinker.

The Art of Creative Thinking

Find  Self Improvement Tips - Curated from popular Books like Atomic Habits, 48 Rules of Power, Deep Work, Rich Dad Poor Dad and way more!

Thinking, Fast and Slow

Available or Attractive?

Stop Overthinking

On Writing

What Your Employees Need and Can't Tell You

The Ultimate Guide to Building a Digital Garden (with a Free Notion Template!)

Navigating the 4 Stages of a Relationship

The Art of Creative Thinking

Tiny Experiments

Rest is progress

It's time to
Read like a Pro.

Thinking, Fast and Slow

Available or Attractive?

Stop Overthinking

On Writing

What Your Employees Need and Can't Tell You

The Ultimate Guide to Building a Digital Garden (with a Free Notion Template!)

Navigating the 4 Stages of a Relationship

The Art of Creative Thinking

Tiny Experiments

Rest is progress

It's time to Read like a Pro.

It's time to
Read like a Pro.